Mother's Day happened?

Mother's day was sort of an odd day for us this year. We did not have a lot of time to plan for it or anticipate it. The weekend before mother's day we were out of town visiting the in-laws. Last week I also started back to work. Those are two big events which did not leave us a lot of time to plan for anything.

We ended up celebrating mother's day on Saturday, as that was when my sister was able to be with us. She has not seen out Little Dude since birth. I took a nice hike with my parents and my sister on Saturday. Saturday evening we had a cook out. My mother grilled steaks, and Hubby made french fries. We also had a salad with it. A nice dinner. It was really good seeing my sister. The Little Dude just loved her! Lots of smiles and laughing was directed at my sister. It was really neat to see.

On Sunday we went to church. I was apparently the newest mother in attendance, though not the youngest. They gave all the mothers flowers, and I got a geranium from the nursery people, which was really sweet. It felt strange to be included in the Mother's Day acknowledgements, though. I know I am a mother, but it just felt so different. For years, I would hide on Mother's day, just to avoid the hoopla. I was used to hiding and trying to pretend that Mother's Day does not exist. It was a little shocking to suddenly be put in the middle of it all. I am now the one getting the gifts, rather than giving them. It just all felt strange to me.

Sunday afternoon, FIL and his wife took the baby for a few hours. Hubby and I went out to lunch, then came home and napped. A very nice afternoon, overall. And the Little Dude did great, apparently. He was generally happy, and easily soothed. They got the chance to show him off. I am so glad the visit went well. Hopefully they will want to do it again.

Overall not too bad a weekend. It was good to see my family, and I got through my first Mother's Day as a mother.

Monday was back to work. Work is going well. People are happy I am back, which is really neat. It is nice to be missed, and nice to be appreciated, at least by my co-workers. Management lives in their own little reality, so I doubt they even noticed my return.

Whew! I did it!

I managed to make it through the day at work. It was a lot easier on me having Hubby drop off the Little Dude this morning. I was nervous leaving the baby, but he did fine. The Little Dude cried some after I left, but then settled back down. He cried all morning at the day care. But then he took a nap. The providers said that he was much better after a nap. After his nap, he smiled and laughed with everyone. When I went to pick him up, he was not crying. He did not even seem upset, and was taking a bottle. The Little Dude seemed fairly content. I think he was happy to see me, though. He then fell asleep in the car on the way home a slept for the next two hours. I think he wore himself out today. He is also sleeping well tonight.

For me, my first day back at work went well. Apparently, I was missed. The few cheers I got when I walked into in=service this morning were a little embarrassing, but sort of neat. And then I could not go anywhere without someone telling me how glad they were that I was back. I also got the dirt on what has been going on since I have been gone. Things are really bad. I am not all that surprised. I was surprised by how many nurses are leaving. A couple left while I was out on leave, and about five more are leaving soon. We also have four docs leaving. I really think that says something about the management of the OR. Something has to change, but I doubt it will change soon. It is really sad to see so many good people leaving because of idiotic management. I hope with all of these people leaving, it sends a message to someone. Something needs to be done.

It was nice to have time away from the baby. I actually felt sort of refreshed after I got home today. I had the energy to pick up a little in the living room, dining room, and guest bedroom. I also washed my pump stuff, and finished loading the dishwasher, and actually started it. It felt really good to get stuff done around the house.

I hope that by working flex, I get away from some of the awful management at work. I know I cannot escape it all. At least my team leader was excited to see me back. Maybe that means I will get to be in gyno surgeries more often. We can only hope...

Now I have a day off tomorrow before a half day of computer training on Friday. I plan on trying to get to the gym tomorrow, have lunch with my parents, and spend lots of time with my Little Dude. A good day!

One down, one to go...

The trip to see MIL went well. Little Dude traveled well, and was mostly well behaved. (Well, he is a baby. There is really only so good he is going to do.) MIL, and the rest of the in-laws loved him. He was a hit all the way around. He got passed around a lot, and he gave everyone his cute little smile. Hopefully, MIL will be able to get out here some time this summer. I will believe it when I see it, though.

My next big event is starting work. I start on Wednesday. I am nervous and excited. I am sure it will be fine, and go well. But I am nervous about it. I hope the nervousness will pass after a day or two. Oh yeah, I still need to get my paperwork done for the day care. I guess I will do that tomorrow. I have the physical, I just need to fill in the paperwork. Hopefully it will not take too long.

Little Dude is getting more active every day. He will roll from front to back, if put on his belly. He really likes to be on his belly now. He can puch himself up and look around. He will make crawling motions, but he does not have the arm or leg strength to make it happen. I am sure that it will happen before long.

Our Little Dude also likes to pet our dogs. If we put him close enough, he will move his little hand across their backs. It is really cute. Of course, our dogs are big enough to hit easily. It is hard to miss something as big as a wall.

OK, off to bed now before I fall over from fatigue. I think I overdid today. At least tomorrow I can take it easy.

Walk before you can run.

I went to the gym today. It is the only way for me to get a workout of any kind, and I need to get rid of this pregnancy weight. The gym has a nursery! Hooray!

I did not do much. I spent 25 minutes on the treadmill. Walking. Not running, but walking. And it right about killed me. I was not expecting that. But when I thought about it later, it makes sense. I spent almost all of my third trimester resting and gestating, and then I had a cesarean and had to recover from surgery. It is no wonder I am weak and need to start slow. I just need to stop being so hard on myself and work on it. I can exercise, just not as hard as I used to. I can get there, it will just take more work than I expected.

I just hate being weak. I used to be strong. I was starting to run before I got pregnant. I was able to move and use my body. OR nursing is very physical, and that was part of what I enjoyed about the job. It is an adjustment for me to realize how weak I am. I need to change my expectations, and think about how I treat myself. I can be strong again, it will just be a journey to get there.


I wanted to thank everyone for all your comments on my last post. We are going down to see MIL Thursday evening. I think we feel like we are forced into this trip, and that is not how we wanted to make our first trip with the baby. We will do it, because his side of the family want to see the Little Dude, and they are obviously unable or unwilling to get out here. But the trip will come with mixed feelings. Frustration at feeling like we are rushed into our first trip. Annoyance because it is a pain in the butt to go out there. (We have to clear our calendars, board dogs, get a hotel room, make the trip, and then drive 30 minutes from the hotel to family, and then make the trip back, and pick up the dogs. No rest for the weary.) Fear about how the baby will do. It is a totally new situation, and Hubby's family are loud. They all talk at once, and they all try to be the one who is heard. It can be totally overwhelming. I am afraid that it will be too much for the Little Dude. I hope he does well, but I am scared that he will be terrible. The trip out there is only half the battle. They also may not understand some of what I do with my baby. But it is my baby, and we have what works for us. They do not have to live with him. I hope he gets the naps he wants. He generally naps several times a day.

There is also happiness and celebration as Hubby's side of the family meets the newest member. I know they are all excited to meet the baby. There is that. He is a cute baby. (Not that we are biased.) There is something special about a baby.

I think I am crazy.

Hubby and I are considering a trip to visit MIL and family. ( Yes, with the baby.) MIL has planned to come down and canceled on us 4 times. She just canceled again this week. She has been saying she is coming to visit us since March. It is driving us both a little batty. We keep expecting her, and she cancels at the last minute. Thus, the trip out to see her. Hopefully that will stop the planning and canceling.

I am not happy with how she keeps making plans and then canceling. I know she has a lot of medical issues which prevent her from traveling, and she is dependent on someone else to drive her. But I really feel that if she was really committed to coming out here, she would just do it. They have buses and planes which come out here. We would even be willing to pay for a ticket for her. All she has to do is ask.

The trip across the state usually takes about 4 hours without a little one. With the baby, I am sure it will take longer. We are both nervous about making it, but hopefully it will be fine. Anyone have any advice on traveling with a 3 month old?

Seriously?

I do not think I am taking my birth control very seriously. I have been skipping days, and forgetting to take it. Post cesarean, I know that I need time for my body to heal. I know that I had major surgery, and I know that I should not get pregnant right away. But I just cannot take birth control seriously.

It took us a decade, a lot of money, and a team of medical professionals to get pregnant the first time. And considering male factor was part of our problem, I have a hard time believing I need birth control to prevent pregnancy. Why waste the money? It is not likely to happen.

Granted, our issue is poor morphology, so we do have sperm. Because of that, there is a chance that I could get pregnant. A very small chance. If it does happen, I will take it, but I am not expecting much.

I do not think I am going to refill my birth control prescription. Between breastfeeding and MFI, the chances of me getting pregnant are really low.

If you are infertile, you have built in birth control.

Just stuff...

Totally wish I had more to post about for ICLW. Not much going on, really. I am spending time with my Little Dude, hiking local trails with my mother, and trying to find space for me. That is harder to do with a little one than one would think. Babies are a lot of work!

I did get a chance to sew yesterday. I make baby blankets for my little one, and I actually got one finished. Only took the entire afternoon. And it is only straight line sewing. Had I been uninterrupted, it would not have taken so long. At least I got it finished. Maybe this means that I can do one a day? We will see. I also have the thought to make some bibs for him, too. He is quite the prolific drooler. (Apparently I have a precocious teether. The drool is incredible. Bibs are a life saver!)

I may go hiking with my mother again today. It is another beautiful day, and the hikes are good for baby and me. I am not sure where we will go. She gets to choose the trail this time.

My mother in law is coming next week, I think. She has been threatening to come down here for a couple months, but kept canceling on us. We are hopeful that next week will be it. Finally. Apparently they rented a car for the trip, so hopefully that means they are committed to actually making the trip. I know she has been anxious to see her grandson. It is difficult for her to make the trip across the state. She has a lot of health problems, and is dependent on others to drive her. Really hoping next week is it.

My parents helped hang things in our nursery. Horton had fallen down, and we had a solar system mobile I wanted to hang. Thanks to my parents the nursery looks finished, finally! Here are a few pics, in case you forgot...

The solar system. And for those astonomy buff out there, it only has 8 planets, so it is correct.


And here is a pic of the Little Dude watching the mobile. He really likes it!


And this is the Horton my sister made for me. I am so glad he is back ib the wall!


Hope everyone has a great day!