And so we wait....

Went in for my one week blood work today. Just progesterone and estradiol, but hopefully it will come back good. We will see. Feeling much better today, too. Things are finally moving again. Thank goodness. We only have one more week to wait for beta. I am just not sure if this cycle worked. I will believe it when I see it.

I cannot think past beta. I almost do not want to hope because I know the post-beta crash if the result is negative will be really bad. On the other hand, with our shared risk program I know we have another chance. And I know we have the embryos to try again. I think we can get several frozen cycles out of the embryos we retrieved. That does give me some hope. I think one of the best things about next cycle is that I do not have to do the stimulation and retrieval thing again. That totally sucked.

It is very hard because I have been open with my family and friends about this process. Everyone is very excited and hopeful. I think Hubby and I are a bit more reserved. One thing many people do not realize is that IVF is NOT a sure thing. There is no garauntee that we will get a baby as a result of this cycle. Hubby and I both understand this. Not sure if my friends and family understand it. I know my mother is hopeful and excited, and she is looking for good omens and praying for me. It would be nice if I only had to do one cycle, but I know that it is not always the case. I guess I just need to keep thinking sticky thoughts. And waiting. Sigh.

This week of waiting will drive me crazy. At least I go back to work starting tomorrow. I think I work almost every day until beta. At least I will be distracted and busy. I guess that is something. I already told Hubby that we are not celebrating anything on Sunday. I may even skip meeting because there will likely be references to THAT holiday. We may call our respective parents, but that is about all we will do.

My goal this next week: To try not to go crazy.

Edit: Hormone levels look good! Talked with the Wizard's new nurse, and things look good, so far. I wonder if I will get a call from the Wizard later. Hmmm.....

Sipping some prune juice, and looking at lolcats. I was sort of hoping lolcats would distract me from the fact that I am drinking prune juice.

If the prune juice does not work, I am going to try milk o'mag later.

I came across this lol, which sort of spoke to me. It just made me giggle, for some reason....


see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Bedrest would be better if..

The dog would not take your spot. I got up to go to the bathroom, and I come back to find this....



Sigh. They can make things so difficult.

I am having a hard time getting motivated to do anything today. Still constipated, though. I have been very burp-y the past few days. I woke up this morning with horrible abdominal pain. It seemed to come on quickly. Called the Wizard, and he was very concerned. I finally 'fessed up to the constipation I have been having. It is about to drive me batty. Hubby went out this morning and got me some Mira.lax, which helped to reduce the pressure and made me way more comfortable. I am also taking the bene.fiber as a fiber supplement. Also drinking a lot of water. (Thus the trips to the bathroom.) But still not BM today. I am ever hopeful, though.

I need to call the Apprentice so that I can make sure I get blood work done. I probably ought to tell him how I have been feeling, too. The Wizard is really worried, but I suspect most of my issues are from constipation, not from ovaries. At least that is what I am hoping.

I really hope all of this is worth it.
Please, let this work!

Transfer complete!

I really hope this took. The day was a bit of an ordeal. I just had to vent.

Hubby wanted to do the drive all in one day. This is not a problem, because our appointment was in the middle of the day. So we drove three hours there. I do not know if I have mentioned this, but I hate long rides in the car. They can make me grumpy. We did stop a couple of times on the way out there. Oh, yeah, and I am constipated, which does nothing for my disposition.

We finally get to the clinic after we ate lunch, and I had to have a full bladder. The Wizard was planning on doing an ultrasound guided transfer. Only problem was, the Wizard was running late, and my bladder kept filling up, so I had to pee just a little bit, so that my bladder would be just the right size so he could visualize the catheter in my uterus.

Once they finally started the procedure, the embryologist could not find one of the blastocysts they planned to transfer, so we had to wait for her to find another. This gave me another opportunity to pee a small amount. (They were the ones who had me drink. If they had just waited, we would not have had this problem.)

Back from the bathroom, and everything had to be put back in. Then they had trouble visualizing the catheter in my uterus. They had to press very hard on my bladder in order to see what they needed to. Just to make things more fun, in order to get in the right position, I had to scoot down on the stretcher with the speculum and everything else inside me. Good times. Fortunately, they finally got everything in the right position this time around, and two blastocysts were transferred to my uterus. Finally.

Hubby was only so much help. He kept getting lightheaded and having to sit down. The only chair in the room was beyond arm's reach of the stretcher. I will say this though, he did manage to stay in the room the entire time. He did drive me all the way home, and we were home in time for dinner. When I did get home, I took some gas.x and bene.fiber with the hope that it will help. I get to spend the next couple of days on the couch. I hope that will help, too.

I really hope all of this was worth it. My day totally sucked.
I hope tomorrow is better.

Transfer tomorrow!

I cannot believe it is here already! This past week and half have been a little crazy. It feels like there is only one thing between me and pregnancy: getting at least one of those little embryos to stick. To me, this is unbelievable. I cannot seem to get my head around it. Hope begins to come out from the corners of my mind, and moves toward center stage. That is really scary for me. I still have the 'believe it when I see it' mindset. That is how I have learned to survive this IF journey. I am starting to feel that this may actually work. On the other hand, I know how devastated I will be if this does not work. If it does not work, the result is going to feel way worse than any IUI cycle. We put a lot of work into this.

But everything looks so good, so far. My ovaries produced a lot of fantastic eggs. Hubby's boys did all the right things and fertilized those eggs. (Well, they did have some help. ICSI takes a lot of the guesswork out of the process.) Those embryos seem to be growing really well. It sort of freaks me out, if you want to know the truth. Probably the only concern the entire cycle is over stimulation. Which has been a minor player, but not enough to cause any problems, apparently. I know it has made the cycle a bit hellish for me here lately. This could actually work.

Fortunately I go back to work by the end of the week, so I will have that to distract me. I think. Because I have been fairly open about this, I am sure I will get a lot of questions. And hopefully people will help me to take it easy. I probably do not want to be doing a whole lot of heavy lifting. But the Wizard knows what I do, so he will understand, I think.

Other randomness...
Just feeling really tired and bloated today. I just feel very full, with a tiny bit of nausea underlying it. Fun times.
It is a really nice day, but I cannot get the energy to get up and go sit outside. Sad but true. I ran errands most of the day today and I am now very, very tired. I just want to lie down on the couch.
I really want a chaise or an adirondack chair and an umbrella for the deck. That would be the bomb.
Hubby is very excited about transfer and the possibility that this cycle could work. He is sort of like a child about it. Though I doubt he will stay in the room for the ultasound guided transfer. He is a real wuss about medical stuff. If he does stay in the room for the entire procedure, I will be very impressed.

Anyway, I think that is about all I have right now.
More later, promise...

Show and Tell: My Hubby Rocks Edition

Hubby planted tomato plants a few weeks ago, and he was so proud of himself. He had some motivation. He wanted fresh tomatos this summer. I promised him that I would do a show and tell with his tomato plants as soon as I could.

So without further ado....

I present Hubby's tomato plants.

















IVF update: All my little embryos look good, all were between grade 4 and grade 3. Our day 5 transfer is Tuesday! Very excited. And Hubby is coming with me! Yay for Hubby!

So you can see why my Hubby rocks!

Now go over to Stirrup Queens and see what every one else is showing!

That knocked me for a loop!

OK... Here are the numbers everyone has been waiting for...

25 eggs retrieved
22 were good enough to fertilize
19 fertilized successfully
They are leaving 10 out, and freezing the rest.

I should get a call today as to whether we will do a day 3 or day 5 transfer. I am debating taking mext week off, as well. If we end up dong a day 5 transfer, I may have to.

The Wizard was an hour late, due to an OR procedure that did not go as planned. I figured I was going to wait, anyway, so I zoned out with my ip.od. I think I even dozed off for a while. The nursing staff was fantastic, and really made the experience pleasant. They even took my ip.od into the procedure room and listened to my music as they did retrieval. They were all a little surprised at how exclectic my music tastes are. I have everything from Jimmy Buffet, Aretha Franklin, some 80's hip hop, Rhiannon, Madonna, Sugarland, Dolly Parton, Doc Watson, and Johnny Cash. I even have some celtic punk on there. They seemed to enjoy it, though.

Boy did I hurt later that evening! Once the block wore off, I really hurt. Unfortunately, the lor.tab I had available made me feel worse. I did not figure out the lor.tab was the problem until last night. Thankfully, once I stopped the lortab, I felt immensely better. Of course, still hurt some, and there is some nausea, but it is not at the level it was at yesterday. I feel good enough to put in my contacts and drink water. I do wear out fairly easily, though. I guess that is not too surprising.

Now to wait for the Wizard's call.

Give me faith!

I feel awful. I have a headache, my back hurts, I am a little on the queasy side, I am tired and irritable, too. Yeah, I am a lot of fun to be around today. Things seem to have gone smoothly this cycle, though not on my time line. I am grumpy that Hubby will not be with me for retrieval. He cannot get away from court. He has 9 cases tomorrow. He is coming tomorrow evening to pick me up from c'ville, though. That is something. But I will miss him tomorrow at the procedure. I think he is going to try to be there for transfer, though. Sigh. Not what I wanted, but I will have to make do.

I really hate being out of control. I hate not having things perfect, at least as I see it in my mind. I want things to go smoothly and on my schedule. Because of all of that, I am horrible with procedures. Thank goodness there are drugs involved! Otherwise, I would be more crazy than I am. I love my doctor, and I get the feeling that he works with this anesthesiologist a lot. That makes me feel a lot better about the procedure.

I just wish there was something to make me feel better now.


*************
Just to answer some questions you all had from my last post.

1. Hubby has sperm stored at the IVF center from previous cycles we did with the Wizard. So there is no problem with him not being there. All the Wizard needs is a few sperm, because we are doing ICSI. I think we have that, at least. I still wish we could have had a fresh sample. Sigh. Not perfect, dammit, but it will have to do.

2. I work in the OR, and the only outlets we have for self expression are our hats and our socks. I happen to have an OR hat which has chickens and eggs on it. I also plan on wearing socks I received in the Great Sock Exchange from M (of Quiet Sanctuary.) (You can read about that here.) She sent me three pairs of socks, and I wore one pair for baseline. I am going to wear another for retrieval.

So here is what I plan on wearing, along with that fabulous-o hospital gown....


If I can just keep from freaking out too much, I should be fine. I think...

And the verdict is...

I AM READY!!!!!! Bring on retrieval!

I think it was well worth the drive out to see the Wizard. I know I feel a lot better and a lot more relaxed after he saw me. I have around 20 follies, and they range from 13 up to 18. It sounds like I have a whole lot on both sides. Apparently the Apprentice measures differently than the Wizard. The Wizard looked at what was there, and said that I was ready for retrieval. I was completely floored.

So here is what is going to happen. Estrogen is still high-ish, so they are worried about over-stimulation.
I have to take my HCG shot tonight at 12:15 AM. (Yes, this is midnight!) I will only take a half dose of the HCG, to hopefully prevent OHSS. I start taking doxycycline tomorrow. I also have to take a medication which hopefully will prevent over-stimulation. I should be able to pick that up tomorrow from the pharmacy.

Retrieval is Thursday. Unfortunately, Hubby cannot be there that day. I have to be in Richmond about 11 AM on retrieval day. Hubby is bringing me to C'ville Wednesday night, and my father is bringing me in for retrieval on Thursday. Then Hubby is coming to pick me up from C'ville to bring me home. At least I think that is how it will work. Big dogs get to hang with me in Charlottesville.

Depending on my estrogen levels, we may or may not do a transfer this cycle. But at least we will have the embryos on ice.

Finally! I am so ready for this.

Off to bathe and then try to find my chicken OR hat...

Weirdness

It would go figure that I am a little different. Finally spoke with the Wizard. He is not quite sure what is happening with this cycle. Right ovary follies grew a little. Left ovary follies did not grow at all. Estrogen is apparently way up. We may have to aspirate, fertilize, and freeze. Damn it.

Off to see the Wizard so that he can hopefully figure all of this out...

Waiting...Always with the waiting!

I had my cooter-cam appointment this morning with the Apprentice, and then had my blood work drawn. Now I am waiting for word from the Wizard! With nothing else to do, the waiting is killing me!

Just for grins and giggles, I took my new camera to the dog park yesterday. (Did I mention I bought myself a new camera for my birthday?) And I managed to catch our dogs in action...


Gertrude does fairly typical dog stuff. Lots of running around and sniffing



Oscar on the other hand...
He has to pee on everything vertical. This is mostly what he does when at the dog park. He generally has nothing left to give by the time we leave. At least he has a good time.

Best Birthday Cake Ever!

It has been a while since I participated in show and tell. But I have a great thing to show off this week! I am so exited about it, I am posted my show and tell a little early.

I have the best birthday cake this year, and I had to share.

This year, Hubby and I were fascinated by the idea of having a custom cake for my birthday. We both thought it would be really funny to have an IVF cake. My birthday just happens to fall in the middle of our first IVF cycle. And I just happened to find someone who was willing to do this for us.

So without further ado, I present our IVF cake....






The inside is chocolate, my favorite cake flavor. The cake baker did say that it was the most unusual cake request she had in a while. I almost do not want to cut into it because it looks so cute!

In other IVF-related news...
My stims seem to be going well. I had a cooter-cam appointment this morning with the Apprentice, and he said that things looked good. I seem to be responding very well to the folli.stim. My endometrium is at 15, and I have a whole lot of eggs cooking. I had 8 measurable follies on my left ovary. (My left ovary is tucked behind my uterus, have I mentioned the twinges I have in my back?) My right ovary is the star, though. I have 14 measurable follies on the right. I came home and told hubby the results of the ultrasound. Hubby responded, "No wonder you are so tired!" I will likely hear from the Wizard later today, after my estradiol levels come back.

My birthday celebration continues tonight at my favorite restaurant, with my favorite band. I think it is fate that they are playing the weekend of my birthday. Party on, dude!

***************
Edit: Heard from the Wizard himself this afternoon. Things still look good. He was very reassuring, but my little follies have not grown as fast as he would have liked, which may push retrieval back to later in the week. That totally blows my whole planned time line apart. I hate that. Now I may have to take more time off of work after my vacation, unless my little follies can get it in gear and grow a whole bunch between now and Monday. He reduced my folli.stim dose a little. (Down to 250.) And I still have to take the lu.pron. Sigh. I hate not being able to do anything to make this work like I want it to. Someone tell me to take a chilly pill!

Happy Birthday to me!

Yep, it is my birthday today, and I am celebrating by getting a massage,a manicure, and a pedicure. My IVF cake will be delivered this afternoon, and I am heading up to Lexington this evening to have dinner with my parents. I am also probably going to buy myself a new digital camera. I am thinking a ca.non power.shot or pan.a.sonic Lum.ix. Both have consistently gotten good reviews, and both have features that I would want to play with.

I think there is something in the air, and I really hope it comes this way. Over the past few months, it seems like a lot of women on my blogroll have gotten pregnant or gotten their heart's child. I have the usual infertile's mixed feelings. I am very happy that they have achieved their goal, but I am jealous as hell because I want my miracle too. It makes me hope that this cycle works. I have faith in my doctor, I just wish I had more faith in my body, and my eggs, and Hubby's sperm.

I know I have a wonderful doctor in the Wizard, and so far, my body seems to be responding perfectly to all the meds. There is a pretty good chance that this will work. The Wizard seems to be fairly confident that we will have a five day transfer. That is what all of us are hoping for. Keeping fingers crossed. Ultrasound again tomorrow morning with the Apprentice. We should know more tomorrow.

I am feeling really sluggish today, but that is likely not very surprising as I have had a stressful couple of weeks, and I am really freaked out about what will happen next week. Not to mention, I think the folli.stim really wipes me out, anyway. At least right now I can give myself the time I need to unwind and relax as much as possible.


Oh, and if you are in the mood for a laugh, go visit XBox4NappyRash. He has got an infertile's soundtrack which is just perfect. Maybe I will have to visit iTun.es....

Beautiful Day!

They let me leave early! I called Hubby, and he was very surprised. (As was I!) I worked 12 hours yesterday. The really crappy 9-9 shift. And then I had to be there early this morning for a ro.bot case. I left work in the dark and then came back this morning in the dark. I winced at the sunshine when I got outside as I was leaving. The best part is that I do not have to go back tomorrow, and it is payday. (I have direct deposit, so I get paid anyway.)

I went into work late yesterday because of my appointment with the cooter-cam. The ultrasound went well. I lost count of how many follicles he measured, but there were a lot of them. Mostly on the right. Folli.stim was increased to 275, and I have to continue the low lu.pron dose. Unfortunately, I am out of TB syringes. I was so excited to leave work today, I forgot to walk off with some. I called the Apprentice's nurse and told her, but I am not sure when she will call me back. I may try calling the Wizard's office if I do not hear from the Apprentice's nurse before I go and run my errands this afternoon. I have another cooter-cam appointment with the Apprentice on Saturday morning. I hope we will know more about retrieval after that appointment.

My birthday seems to be shaping up nicely. I have appointments tomorrow morning for a massage, manicure, pedicure, and eyebrow grooming. I have not heard back from my cake baker, but I am thinking of calling her this afternoon. At least emailing her. Just to be sure. I am just a bit OCD, and I worry about things. My parents want to meet with Hubby and me tomorrow to celebrate my birthday, and that may be possible. I think I need to talk with my mother and see what she wants to do.

Right now, I may go for a nice long soak in the tub with my Bath.erapy salts. I love that stuff! Then I may work for a bit on putting the house back together, before running errands. Hubby is grilling buffalo burgers for dinner because it is so nice out. It is really nice to have the time to get myself back together again.

Mid week..

Still on a very low dose of lu.pron. Folli.stim is definitely in play, though. I am feeling a little tired by the end of the day. And I forgot how much it stings as it goes in! No major hot flashes, yet. I am sure they are coming. Just you wait. My baseline is tomorrow, and I have a hunch the lupron will be stopped tomorrow. Not sure what will happen with the folli.stim. Likely I will get two phone calls after my results are in. One from the Wizard's nurse, and one from the Wizard himself, trying to make sure the nurse told me everything I need to know. Unfortunately, I work 9-9 tomorrow, so we will see what happens. I am hoping to get off early. With luck, I will be home by 7 PM.

I was thinking about this cycle on my way home from work today. I would love it if it works. It would be a fantastic birthday gift. (My birthday is Friday.) But if the cycle does not work, we get another try. And that is all right. I have talked about what would happen if the cycle does work, and I have thought about what would happen if the cycle does not work. Yeah, it would suck if this cycle does not work. Likely I will not be happy about it. But we can try again. There is a lot to be said for that. I know it makes me a whole lot more comfortable with where I am at right now.

Hubby had a great idea for a birthday cake for me. He wants a birthday cake in the shape of a petri dish with a sperm and an egg inside. I found a cake baker who would be willing to do one for me by Friday. I will post pictures when I get it. (If you have not guessed, Hubby is pretty excited about the IVF.)

Saturday my favorite band is coming to my favorite restaurant, so I know where I will be in Friday night. It should be a good time, and a great distraction from everything.

Will post more when I have time after my appointment.

LOL Monday

Really needed a smile today....



moar funny pictures

Have a good Monday!

I hope your Easter is better than mine.

I am traveling up to Reston to see my grandparents for Easter. For those just tuning in, my grandfather was diagnosed with adeno.carcinoma several months ago. Reports from my family since the diagnosis are mixed. My aunt and grandmother are doing everything they can to deal with the cancer. They had an appointment at George.town's cancer center, and through them my grandfather is on chemo, and possibly heading toward either radiation or a cyberknife procedure. There is about a 50% chance he could get rid of the cancer, provided the origin of the cancer is the colon. Apparently they have no idea of the source of the cancer. I think he is due a PET scan before long, but I am not sure what that could tell us that the other scans have not shown us. My mother and sister are a bit more pragmatic about the situation. My sister visited about a month ago and reported that my grandfather seemed like a shadow of himself. Apparently he is not eating much, he is sleeping a lot, and he forgets things. A neurologist exam showed no Alzheimers, but there is some memory dysfunction. Also I think he is having problems with his vision and hearing aids.

Yeah, I think my family will be trying deperately to pretend everything is normal. I have a hunch it will be hell.

And I start stims today. I start to taper down my lu.pron and start taking folli.stim. Hormone city, here I come. Between the my grandfather's cancer, and my hormone stimulation, this is not going to be fun. I want to call in sick, but this may be the last Easter I get with my grandfather. I think it is sort of important I be there.

Sock it to me! All systems are go!

M from Silent Sanctuary sent me three wonderful pairs of purple and pink socks! They did get here in time for my baseline today. It was really comforting knowing I had the support of the ALI community throughout this IF journey. One thing which amazed me was that these socks made their way to me from Tasmania, Australia! Seriously! Hubby was just floored when my socks came, and I showed him the return address. It is amazing how close the connections can be , despite the geographical distance. I hope some of M's juju came with the socks. (M is currently pregnant after IF.) I could really use it as I go through this first IVF cycle.
.

I wore one pair of socks for my baseline today, and I plan on wearing one for retrieval and one for transfer. I love idea of having the ALI community with me during the procedures. I also think it is way cool that these are from Tasmania.

By the way, the baseline went fine. Everything looked good to start folli.stim on Saturday. Hubby starts his doxycycline the same day. I got phone calls today from the Wizard's new nurse, and the Wizard himself. I love it when a doc is just as OCD as I am. It makes me happy that we are all on the same page. The Wizard and I just talked about a couple of questions he had. He wanted to make sure we are doing ICSI (yes!). He also wanted to talk about day 3 vs day 5 transfer. I think we are both hoping for a day five transfer. He thinks that is fairly likely to happen. I have an appointment with the Apprentice on Wednesday to see what I have brewing, and I am not sure of anything else after that.

For some reason I was really nervous about the baseline today. I think I was nervous about it because everything seems to be going so smoothly. My period is even light from the lupron and BCPs. Very bizarre. I am a wee bit nervous because things are going so well. I am also really nervous about starting folli.stim on Saturday. It is a high dose (for me), and it is higher than either of my previous injectable cycles. I remember when I was on the high-ish dose of folli.stim I had a few hot flashes, and fatigue. It really wiped me out. Oh, and I was really bloated, as well. I have a feeling I will have all of that, only worse because of the higher folli.stim dose. I can just see it coming.

I only have one more week til my vacation starts. One more week until retreival and transfer. I scheduled my vacation to start on my birthday, and then I am off the entire next week. I am hoping for a nice present from the Wizard for my birthday. Send any good juju you can spare my way, please!

Edit: Just realized that we are starting stims on Easter weekend. I hope this is a good omen!

Maybe I should have clarified...

I forget that people outside the OR talk a little differently about stuff.

To clarify: I am not taking out people's eyes and cleaning them. That does not happen all that often. (I have learned to never say never when it comes to OR procedure.) Most of the time, the eye stays in the eye socket.

I am learning to scrub in and assist the eye surgeons on various procedures. If you have a bleed in your eye, a detached retina, I want to be right there.

It is sooo cool seeing the inside of the eye. They also have the best toys. Retinal stuff is just like little tiny laparoscopic procedure. Cannot wait to learn more.

In IF news, baseline is tomorrow. They assigned me a room at work, so I have to come in as soon as I can. Unfortunately, my appointment is not until 8:45 AM. I may try to get there early on the off chance the Apprentice can do it sooner. Sigh. If this is the worst that happens, I think I got off light.

Smooth

I had to call the Wizard's office to let them know that my period started. They called me back this afternoon. Apparently the Wizard's regular nurse was out, and they had another nurse returning the phone calls. The Wizard was with the nurse when she called me. Apparently the cycle is going well so far. I am on schedule with my meds, and so far, everything looks good. I am really surprised at how well things have gone so far. So far, so good seems to be the theme. It sort of scares me that things have gone so well. My baseline is Thursday, so we will see what happens. The Wizard is going to proceed as if everything is fine. I keep going with lu.pron, and start folli.stim on Saturday. I do have a few questions, so I probably ought to call and ask them soon.
I told Hubby about my conversation with the substitute nurse. How the Wizard was right there asking questions and telling me what he said. He finally did get talk to me at the end of the conversation. I have been the interpreting nurse before, so I understand what she is going through. It happens often in the OR when the surgeon is scrubbed in. Hubby apparently has had secretaries return calls while he is there. Not sure why. We both had a chuckle about the experience.

In other news...

• I am going to the grandparents for Easter. This is likely the last Easter we may have my grandfather around. My grandmother wants my grandfather to be able to get a picture with the family dogs. This may be the best chance to get it.
  
• I really need to get the dogs bathed before we leave for the grandparents. I need to call for an appointment. Hopefully I can get them groomed on Saturday.
  
• I finally got in to learn to scrub eyes. I played with a retinal surgeon today, and he said I did really well. I had a great day, and I got to leave early. Good times all round.
• Hubby wants to go on record as doing all the work with the tomatoes. So here it is: Hubby did all the the work with the tomatoes. He put the containers together, he planted them in the pots, he waters them, and he is taking care of them. They look pretty happy, despite the chill in the air, of late. We chose several different heirloom varieties, which hopefully will work out for us. I know I need to post some pictures. (I am slacking in the photo department.)

That is about all that is going on. I guess that is enough.

Ugh! It's Monday!

It does not feel like a Monday to me because I ended up being called in to work yesterday. And it was beautiful yesterday, too. I missed it. It is supposed to be snowing and rainy tonight and tomorrow. Stoopid work! They did let me play with the robot today, and I get to scrub eyes tomorrow. Work is going well at the moment, as long as I can ignore management.

I think I started spotting today, and I think it is pre-menstrual spotting. If it continues, and it probably will, I have to call the Wizard's office tomorrow to let them know. I have a hunch tomorrow will be CD1. I have a baseline scheduled for Thursday morning, so it should work out all right. (The Wizard really knew his stuff. At our consult, he told me to schedule a baseline for April 9.)

The local artisan bakery I love has hot cross buns as the monthly special this month. I may order a dozen and bring them up to the grandparent's house. It sounds like this may be the last Easter we get with my grandfather, and I really wanted to see him again. I also want to order by birthday cake from the bakery. My birthday is the weekend before retrieval and transfer. I think I deserve something special.

Lu.pron is not affecting me too badly. I am just having normal PMS and menstrual symptoms, so no problems there. I have a hunch the folli.stim will be a different story. Holy cow, I just realized that I will start taking follistim by the end of this week! Bring on the hot flashes and irritability!

And now something just to make you smile:


moar funny pictures

randomness

I do not have any profound or even coherent blog posts right now. But I do have some thoughts I wanted to put out there.

• Both hubby and I are excited about this cycle. I still do not understand how the male mind works, though. The other day he told me, "I think I am excited about the IVF. I have been vaguely horny all week." I am not sure how one leads to the other.
  
• So far, so good with the Lu.pron. No irritability or major headaches, yet. I warned Hubby about the potential side effects, and I think he is almost waiting for it to happen.
• I go off BCPs on Sunday, and baseline is scheduled for Thursday April 9. I am a little annoyed at the Apprentice because he messed with my schedule. I made sure that I was working a day shift so I could do the baseline u/s after work. That backfired on me as he is off at a class that afternoon. He also has a meeting that morning, so he cannot even see me until 8:45. Just a wee bit frustrated about that. On the other hand, it is only one, maybe two days I have to come in late. (I have a hunch he will likely want to see me on Monday, too.)
• We may try planting tomato plants this year. Hubby wants fresh tomato. I have a hunch that I will be doing most of the work, though. I guess I should look into raising tomato plants.
• My vacation is in two weeks. I am starting my vacation on my birthday, and my retrieval and transfer are hopefully going to happen during that week. I have faith that it will be so. It is unreal that it is so close.
  

I think that is all I have right now. Thanks for all your wonderful comments!

Here we go...

Lu.pron starts tomorrow. Now that I know the dose is in milliliters, and not milligrams, I feel a lot better. No need to try to do a conversion from mg to ml. I really need to stop over thinking. A quick call to the Wizard's office and a conversation with the Wizard's nurse cleared up a lot of stuff. I guess I will start the medication in the morning. I can take the Lu.pron early in the morning or in the evening before bed. Nothing in between because I work a 12 hour shift tomorrow. Morning may be better to try to stay on schedule. I have my needles and medication at the ready. Well sort of. I at least located everything tonight.

The infertility roller coaster feels more real this time. This week I have felt like I am on the climb at the start of a roller coaster. The ride starts tomorrow with the lu.pron. And similar to a riding a roller coaster, I am really freaked out by the potential ride. I cannot control what happens. All I can do is strap in and try to enjoy the journey. Not a strong point for me.

Both Hubby and I are excited about our chances with IVF. The Wizard is also doing ICSI, which hopefully will improve our chances, as male factor is one of our issues. Hubby has already figured out when a little one (or two) are likely to arrive, should this cycle be successful. I think he is pretty excited about this. I am also sort of excited, but also afraid to hope. IVF has the highest percentage of success out of anything we have tried. The Wizard has a 50 something percent success rate for my age group. That is way higher than the success rate of IUI.

I guess I can allow myself a little hope.