I think I have been ignoring certain things. I took my pulse this morning after going back to bed for a while, and it was just over 100. I have been ignoring the fact that I get out of breath going up and down the stairs to let the dogs out. I feel tired all the time. And then there is the random nausea. The frustrating thing is that these symptoms are also common with pregnancy. It is hard to tell which are pregnancy symptoms and which are the result of tachycardia. I am just trying to be gentle with myself. I think that is all I can do.
Yesterday I came to the realization that I do not have a lot of control over what is happening to me. All I can do is rest, and even then, my heart still beats fast. Physiologically, I understand what is likely happening. My blood volume is increased due to the pregnancy, which causes my heart to work harder. In order for my heart to pump the increased volume, it tries to pump faster in an effort to be more efficient. Knowing what is likely happening does not make it any easier to deal with. I still feel like my body betrayed me. Again. (As if dealing with IF wasn't bad enough!) I want to be able to walk dogs and work and keep up with life. But I get tired just going downstairs to let the dogs out. I get out of breath when I walk my dogs. I just want to cry because it feels like I should still be able to do these things. I am pregnant, I do not want to be sick on top of that!
I know that heart problems are serious problems and I should take them seriously. I hate the fact that Hubby is scared for me. I hate the fact that I think I am now a high risk pregnancy. (Or maybe medium risk at least. Fairly sure I am not low risk anymore.) I suspect that I will be out of work for a while because of my heart problems. Maybe even the rest of the pregnancy. I guess it is better to have me at home and taking it easy than risk work and another misadventure at the hospital.
I honestly thought it would be my blood sugar causing problems for me, not my heart.