Saturday, May 16, 2009


I have had a hard time getting motivated lately. Yesterday evening I collapsed on the couch after I got home from work. Then I went to bed early, like 8:30 PM. I kept dozing off in front of the TV, so I finally just gave it up and went to bed. Today is turning out to be a perfect day to lie on the couch, so that is exactly what I am doing this afternoon. I hope to go out this evening to watch my favorite band at my favorite restaurant, so I need to rest up.

I did get up the energy to run errands this morning. We really needed dog food, and apparently I really needed to buy some HPTs. Success on both counts. I POAS as soon as I got home. (Well, I had to go, anyway!) I was really nervous about doing it. For some reason I was afraid that it would come out negative. But no! Apparently I am still pregnant! And I now know what a positive HPT looks like. I have to give all my lovely commenters credit, though. It is definitely a validation of what I am going through. It makes the pregnancy feel more real, somehow. I also really appreciate all the comments you all have been leaving, they also help me realize that I am normal, after all. Thank you all.

The other reassurance I found is from a doctor's blog. I found Infertility Blog during my wait for beta, and he recently went through and catalogued his posts. He even had a post on there about pregnancy after IF. It was not much, but it was reassuring. Apparently odds are in my favor for this baby being born.

So, I just need to relax and enjoy the ride. My body seems to know what it is doing.


Duck said...

Hang in there - I imagine it's hard when we deal with this kinda losses/infertility and finally pregnant to enjoy it at all (if such a thing exists).

Serendipity said...

Dr Licciardi's blog really is fantastic, it saved my sanity a few times. I'm so glad you got a HPT and that it helped.

I keep telling myself that we had difficulty with getting knocked up and only time will tell if I can stay that way but until then I'm pregnant and I kinda figure if the child is anything like the parents he/she will fight for life like we fought for them iykwim?

Lorza said...

I am sorry you are feeling unmotivated! Glad though that your POAS was still a BFP! Keep you chin up girlie!!!

I also LOVE Dr. Licciardi's blog. It is actually the fist IF blog I ever found...and that is how I realized so many people blogged about their IF journey. LOVE IT!!

Infertility is Hard said...

I love that infertility blog that you reference here. I read it all the time. Everytime I read scary stuff about infertility and pregnancy on the internet, his blog brings me back to reality. :-D

annacyclopedia said...

I would say feeling unmotivated is another symptom. The other day I went home for lunch and when I turned on the stove I felt so weird. Then I realized that I didn't remember the last time I had turned on the stove! Manny has been doing all the cooking and generally letting me crash as much as I need to. And early bedtimes have become an institution in our house - in bed by 9 generally and definitely asleep before 10. I'm lame but at least I'm well-rested!

And I agree that it's good to get some perspective - despite all the things that can go wrong, the odds are definitely in your favor to have a healthy baby. Glad you're finding reassurance when you need it.